kh_drabble | Xigbar Drabble

Challenge: None
Title: Self Perception: Xigbar
Word Count: 329
(anything else): Erm,if you haven't played KH2 or CoM, you may not know who this is. It just dives a bit into the character of Xigbar/Braig.

Who Am I?
The question often haunts my every thought. I'm so confused. Am I only Xigbar? Or am I still Braig deep deep down? Does the quote, "A rose by any other name would still smell just as sweet." hold true? What's in a name?

As Braig...
I was a sensible and strict man.I didn't always like the sound of blood hitting the floor. Nor the sound a bullet makes as it leaves the safety of the gun and whizzes through the air. I used to despise the smell of gunpowder, and once, upon a time oh so long ago, the sight of blood made me sick. I lived and thirsted for answers. Math and logic were my freedom, illogic a prison. But that was then. Back when I was Braig.

As Xigbar...
Now, I live for the fight. The thrill of battle excites me to no end, and the feeling I get when I pull the trigger fills me to the brink with a rush of pleasure. I love the sight of blood flowing from some unfortune opponent's body, and the smell of gunpowder is my absolute favorite. I love taunting my opponents, frustrating them to the point of madness, then adding to it when they attack and I simply teleport out of harm's way. The feeling of the gun's cold steel and the comfort of its loaded weight are my freedom now. Illogic no longer matters. My strictness and sensibility have been lost. With my surfer like, laid back attitude, I'm Xigbar now.

Which one?
Sometimes, I'm Braig again. Sometimes I turn my head when the blood begins to flow from the body, and sometimes at night, I stay up doing quantium physics equations on the solid white walls of Castle Oblivion. Mainly, I'm Xigbar, the "Freeshooter" and master of the element of space. The one who lives for blood, the sound of bullets being fired, and the lovely, lovely smell of gunpowder.

Regardless of my name...
I'll always be Organization XIII's Number II.