Challenge Post

[emptybackpack.livejournal.com]

Challenge: [066] Rhyme
Title: Quiet Truths
Word Count: 81
Spoilers: Vague KHII spoilers.
Rating: G
Notes: Six rhyming haiku. Yes, haiku aren't meant to rhyme. But they can.


Roxas:
he'll never be whole
memory is the essence
of the human soul


Axel:
he was never told
hope is mankind's cruelest gift
he learned that alone


Riku:
more than a blindfold
he is beholden to none
if he can't behold


Sora:
he'll never be free
there is work yet to be done
in bearing the Key


Kairi:
sanctuary, whole
at last, she can't help but smile
it's been a long while


Naminé:
her chance at parole
she and he are trapped in chains
only one remains

Comments

[kunoichi-life.livejournal.com]

not only are you doing haikus, you're making them rhyme as well. It's madness!!

Short, but they're right at the heart of the characters. =D I love em'

[emptybackpack.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I love the medium of haiku.

[inastr8jacket.livejournal.com]

Those were neat :]
Roxas is my favorite one. It sounds like something that like, DiZ or even Axel or some other character would actually say in referance to Roxas.

[emptybackpack.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I think that one's my favorite too. It's such a workable concept.

[syvia.livejournal.com]

XD I love haikus. Sometimes you have to think very hard to figure out what they mean, sometimes it's just a pithy little idea, and other times you get more out of three lines than you can from an epic. Sora's is my favorite, but they're all wonderfully clever.

*applauds*

[emptybackpack.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much! Sora's is acutally the one I dislike most, personally. I never seemed to get it to flow the way I wanted. Though of course Kairi's is the worst stylistically. Commas. Thank you very much.

[avalonestel.livejournal.com]

Wonderful job! I really like how these rhymed, even though haikus usually don't. And what a creative use of the challenge! These were all lovely, and I especially like Riku's and Axel's. Good luck in the contest!

[emptybackpack.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I do like Axel's a great deal, also. I'm glad you do too. The middle line is such a wonderful precept to work with. I enjoy your writing, by the way.

[avalonestel.livejournal.com]

Hope is always a wonderful concept to deal with. I was wondering if you mind me using that line in an original work of mine? I'll give you credit! And I'm glad you enjoy my writing. I enjoy yours, too. I didn't have time to review it the other day, but I loved the fic you posted the other day about Axel being Riku's nobody. It's a parallel I've drawn myself often!

[emptybackpack.livejournal.com]

I'm honored you like the phrase/concept that much. I'd be happy to see it go to good use. (Given credit is great, I suppose, because apparently it's rather original. Who knew? Google.) I must warn you, however, that I did use it in the only one of my novels that I'd ever consider getting published. But I wouldn't think that would cause any problems, since getting published is a nearly insurmountable task anyhow.

[avalonestel.livejournal.com]

No, that shouldn't be a problem, especially if I have your permission. I really, really appreciate you letting me use it, because it's an amazing line, it really is. Happy writing!

[tabitha-dornoc.livejournal.com]

*melts* So pretty and lovely! It's just, it's tricky enough to write good haiku's, let alone make them rhyme, let alone allow them to be spot on in character. They're all well done, but Axel's sticks darkly in my mind in particular. Mm, much much love.

[emptybackpack.livejournal.com]

I am exceedingly honored you enjoyed this. I love the medium of haiku. Earlier this month I did about half a day's wordcount quota for JuNoWriMo entirely in haiku. They're just so enchanting. I'm glad you appreciated the rhyming. I actually noticed this morning a pair of lines I'd forgotten to make rhyme between haiku. It looks odd, because the other four haiku all have rhyming lines between them. And that was perhaps an excess of information. Alas. But thank you very much.

[topazeyes.livejournal.com]

WOW! What you did was amazing! Props to you, friend!

[emptybackpack.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it.

[voodoodoll333.livejournal.com]

more than a blindfold
he is beholden to none
if he can't behold


Who wants to behold Riku? I think he had it backwards. I'd rather Ansem!Riku wear the blindfold and he wear the hood. Unf unf.

Like weird, weird bondage.

[emptybackpack.livejournal.com]

. . . -stares-

You do that, hon. And I'm actually not sure who the second 'he' is. -coughs politely-