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[masakomoonshade.livejournal.com]

Challenge: [137] Identity
Title:  Descent and Damnation
Word Count: 348
Rating: PG-13
Note: here's a link to what this stemmed from-- the attack at 3:28 of this clip. And there's spoilers for the end of KH2, I guess, though you'd need to have played the game to have any idea what I'm talking about.

I want to shout, yell, plead, beg--

There...

--cry. Even cry, if only because I haven't done enough of that lately, and I should, but nothing--nothing hurts like this.

...I can see it now. So clearly...

And it frightens me. The fact that it was so easy, so fast, and then--

...Darkness. It runs deep in you.

--just like that, it was a part of me. He is a part of me. I should have ducked. I should have dodged or fought harder or-- or something.

Jealousy. Fury. A taste for blood. You enjoyed it, didn't you?

Suddenly I know how Riku feels--how he felt, all that time, halfway between, half in control, and...

Your passion was born of battle. Of conquest. Of murder.

And I feel it now, at the edge of my mind, the edge of my soul. The same way I felt that spear of electricity pierce my chest, cut me apart from the inside. I felt him then, as he tried to tear out my heart and left a part of himself in its place. The same way I feel Roxas fighting against him every minute, fighting to exhaustion, fighting to keep us both alive.

You care nothing for right and wrong. All you need are excuses.

And now I can see him--just a glimpse now and again, just in the corner of my eye--but when I get angry, frightened, enraged--

And I will give them to you.

I can feel his pulse in place of my own. His smirk, his eyes, his cold, his Dark.

And your blade will taste blood again.

And the very thought of it brings chills to my spine, like a ripple of ice, like a spasm that shakes all my body, and I cling to the bathroom counter just to keep my legs from giving out.

Don't you understand, little boy?

I hear his voice and I want to scream. And I look up, just to tell myself that I'm okay, I'm real, I'm Sora, it's all in my head--

Don't you understand, foolish Keybearer?

The face in the mirror isn't mine. My sweat runs slippery on his palms. My tears fall once down his cheeks, and dry an instant after. Because it's a battle I can't win.

Because it's a battle I'm not sure I want to win.

Because I am you.

Comments

[dreamer1789.livejournal.com]

Intense and enjoyable. ^^

nothing huts like this. I think you wanted to say 'hurts' there.
fighting to exhuastion 'exhaustion'
Just thought you might want to know.

[masakomoonshade.livejournal.com]

Thanks-- I wrote it in Wordpad, because that computer doesn't have a spellcheck. I'll fix it right away.